Flying High

A guy and a girl cam in, stoned out of their mind. The guy stared at a spot on the wall blankly. The girl went on to order a peppermint mocha and made sure we put sprinkles on it. When we went to put sprinkles on it this conversation took place:

Girl: No, I want the red sprinkles
Barista: We don't have red sprinkles
Girl: I just saw you put some on
Barista: No, I put these chocolate sprinkles on it.
*Shows sprinkles container*
Girl: But (insert popular/commercial coffee shop name here) has them
Barista: We're not (name inserted above) we just sell their coffee and drinks.
Girl: So, do you bake your cookies here?
Barista: Yes
Girl: Well, the sugar cookies have red sprinkles so why cant you just put some of those on my drink?
Barista: They're pre-made, just just bake them in the oven
Girl: Oh, so you don't bake your own cookies...can I get more sprinkles?
*Barista adds more chocolate sprinkles and girl walks away*
Girl: Can I PLEASE get more sprinkles?
Barista: You've got 3 layers!
Girl: So I can't have anymore?
Barista: Of course you can.
*Barista adds, again, more sprinkles and the girl walks away*

On her way out, she stopped the manager and told her we were short with her and refusing service. The manager immediately came over and chewed us out reminding us how the cafe must score "Perfectly" in customer service shops, no matter how people treat us.

Bird-Flu Guy

There is a very interesting person who frequents my cafe. He walks everywhere around town and comes in, ordering an Italian soda and walks the barista making his drink through each step as if they have never made the drink before. Besides being obnoxious, he has many weird characteristics and memorable stories all occurring in the cafe or the bookstore.

Anyway, one night he began describing how to gut a human being to the barista working. He used hand motions and when she began ignoring her, he pulled out a huge knife and used it to show her how to do it. Then he goes on to tell her that he's killed a man before but it was okay because it was self defense.

And that's the first in the long running story of Bird-Flu Guy.

Soy Girl and Sidekick

So this is how it works, I'll post a short, true story about something I saw or heard at work.

Today's story occured a few days ago and was overheard while I was finishing making someones drink:

Soy Girl: If soy milk isn't organic milk, then what is it?

Sidekick: Soy milk is a milk alternative allowing those who are lactose intolerant to have something that would normally have milk in it. Soy milk is actually made from soy, not cows. Organic milk is from cows not given drugs to make more milk or make them bigger.

Soy Girl: But its called 'soy milk' so obviously it comes from cows and cows are animals so isn't all milk organic?

Sidekick: That's a good point...I don't know...

At this point of the conversation they had walked away.

More stories with other characters to come later.

Welcome

The stories posted on this blog are all true and were heard while making coffee in a bookstore cafe, exactly like the title states. English teachers around the world are rejoicing. To further explain why I am writing this requires a bit of history about me.

I graduated college with a degree in Anthropology which led me to observe people in the natural environment and question their behavior. As a result I am always listening and observing the people around me. Working as a barista has provided a great opportunity to exercise these skills and, needless to say, servers and baristas are invisible to the customer for most of the transaction allowing even more conversations to be overheard.

I don't know how often I will post stories. They will be true and there will be reoccurring characters so keep up and visit frequently.